Life is really a trippy ride. In one day a life is close to ending and another receives serious relief. I just constantly have to remind myself that it's about the day to day. Don't get so caught up in trying to reach a certain goal, but rather enjoy the ups and downs of how you get to the goal.

My Mamaw is back in the hospital, her prognosis poor. They're suggesting hospice. My Mom is devastated. I can't imagine making that call and being in her place. I can only try and help where I can, which isn't much.

I, too, am waiting for results on a biopsy and dealing with my already precarious day to day health issues. A year ago I would never have considered myself a sickly person, but now I'm connected to a pump through my abdomen, spending thousands on medical bills and waiting for the worst from doctors at all times. That's why I am so glad to be doing my own thing with work. As stressful as it is to be your own provider, I have such an appreciation for life I didn't have before. Everything is an opportunity to experience - the good, the terrible and the awful. I'm really working to keep my outlook focused and my stress level down. Like I just said before, it's the day to day that's living. Life doesn't start once you reach a goal. It's now. It's overcoming what just happened or getting through what's going on. The shit. That's what life is. It's really living. Relationship struggles, friendship issues, health warnings, job problems. That's life. So put a smile on your face and live it.

At least that's what I'm trying to do.